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Quaker, French-speaker, educator, anti-racist; Southern-born & raised, and talking enthusaist.

2021-10-05

Pentacles and Pentagrams and Problems Oh My!

Up until recently, I've been wearing pentacles in some form for decades.  For many years I wore a pentacross; simply put it's a pentacle with a cross superimposed on it.  I bought it at Crystal Fox. It's pewter and one can barely see the cross on it.  It's there though.


Initially, I liked this because it represented who I was at the time, pagan at heart, Christian by confession.  Actually, I was and am a member of the Religious Society of Friends, a Quaker, and there is no symbol that represents us.  There is a symbol that represents our service organization, the American Friends Service Committee.  Interestingly, it's a star (a compass, but a star).






There's the rub.  Whether I wore a cross (I have crosses and rosaries hanging from my ceilings and walls, and a cross tattooed on my back) or a pentacle (I also have those on my walls and as jewelry), I was betraying the ancient Quaker testimony against outward forms and symbols.

You see, we Quakers do not believe that objects in and of themselves have power. The power is within and comes from without.  That is to say, the Divine Light shines inward, resides inside, and the power to overcome addictions and attachments is found there.  Crosses don't get you there. Neither do pentacles.  They can be outward signs of inward realities but to us, the best sign of the Inward Life lived, is that just, that one's life speaks.  We are to be patterns and examples, to walk cheerfully over the world answering that of God (the Light) within the people we encounter.

That Light exists in all persons.  Early and modern Christian Quakers believe that light is of Christ, the "True Light that cometh into the world."   "The word of God."    Most Liberal Friends would  not go so far as to be so bold, but would rather say that Jesus embodied the Light and that Light is the same Light that is in us.  A heresy, no doubt.  Some Liberal Friends, could care less either way.

There is no symbol for the Light and there doesn't need to be.  Whether  Quakers study Buddhism, paganism, Christianity or whatever, we are still unified in the Light and our bodies and meetinghouse remain unadorned.

Well, except for many Evangelical Quakers who do wear crosses and do get baptized and some do have crosses and stained glass windows in their churches.  And pagan Quakers often wear pentacles or other symbols. Some Liberal Friends participate in New Age and indigenous practices and wear crystals or holy symbols of other faiths.

As for me, I wrestled until recently with these symbols that I wore and adorned my house with, weren't Quakerly.  They were Christian, pagan, and Christopagan, but not Quaker.  But I justified it as acknowledging that they held no power, that they were not magical in and of themselves, and they did symbolize how I saw myself. Both Christian and pagan.  And I wasn't alone among Friends in wearing religious symbols anymore.

Professionally, my students have never brought up the ring that I often wear that has a pentacle.  I did have one Muslim student say he was glad I quit wearing it. Neither my principals, my colleagues nor most students ever said anything about it.  I felt comfortable that way.

But this year it's been different. I wear a bunch of punk skull, eye, dragon, broom, claw rings on Thursdays usually when I play DnD with my students.  Those draw eyes immediately, but they're costume. I'm hardly gangsta.  But I noticed one person in particular eyeing the pentacle ring.  Today the pentacle around my neck was out of my shirt where I usually keep it.  Eyes were on it.

I know nothing of the faith of two of my administrators and don't care.  It's not my business. But I immediately went into "uh oh" mode.  I mentioned this to my trainer and he asked what the pentacle stands for.  I told him. In paganism and witchcraft it stands for the four elements and Spirit. If it's right side up it's spirit over matter. If upside down matter over spirit. It's not about good and evil.  Those concepts exist in certain circles (they do among most Quakers, though some liberals choose to talk with secular terms about harm and healing or whatever). Some would say good and evil are subjective.  Holy people do evil things.  We have both in us.  In the East, I told my trainer, the pentagram symbolizes fire air water wood & metal.  I added that for several centuries after Jesus' execution, that pentagram (no circle) was used to either symbolize the five wounds of Christ, or the uninterrupted line symbolized the  the alpha and the omega (Got Questions Ministries, 2002-2021)

After telling me to quit stalling on the machine,  he then asked the more important question "What does it symbolize to you?"  To me it's a symbol of universality. Of the Power, of the Light (Spirit over matter) or the Dark (matter over spirit). Again, neither are good or evil. They just are two manifestations of the same elements.  That universality includes mathematics (which I hate), the elements are explained with science (which I admire but don't fully understand beyond a certain point) the spirit, Jesus, deities, ancestors  (religion).  It represents interconnectedness, East and West, knowledge and mystery; in essence it represents All; matter and spirit in one.  When I see one I think of the wonders of this planet and universe.  I think of the living and the dead.  I think of a star, and what does a star emanate? Light. What can a dark star absorb with its gravity? Light.  Dark and Light.  Stars. See?  I think on the Quaker star, with its red and black and to me it's again two lights. Dark and Color.  

I wanted so desperately for the crosses I wore to symbolize an inward reality that was true, but the mythology no longer spoke to me. The oppressive history (and current reality) of so-called Christians made the cross into a symbol of oppression not a symbol of resurrection.  Plus, I was a professor of sorts. I did not live the life I thought I should live, the life that Quakers encouraged, the Life that was led not forced.  I professed things I did not live but was articulate in so doing.  I was false.  I did not die on my cross daily. Instead I beat myself up with the cross and let others do it too.  I had to lay it down.

Some Quakers will tell you I'm too hard on myself, but for whatever reason I came to a place where I could no longer pick up the cross, though it's still on my back.  I could no longer confess what I did not believe.  Plus I had begun the practice of venerating my ancestors (not worshiping them).  When I shared this with my Quaker community, they supported and loved me, and reminded me we are liberal Quakers. It's ok.

It's been months since I've worn any jewelry beyond a watch.  I have pentacles all over the place, in windows and on walls along with rosaries hanging from the ceiling and a cross blessed by a pope on a wall. One is on my front door and my back door.  I don't even think about it.  They are not the Light. They are not science. They are not the material world nor are they the inward life.  But I will wear them as long as I can.  And when I can't, because of an inward motion to stop, I will lay them down.

Some of my students have figured out through Instagram my spell casting and ritualistic proclivities. So I got rid of a lot of those pics and made my account private.  A witch? Qui moi? ๐Ÿ˜Ž   Ok, so, as for a label for me let's see: we have Quagans (Quaker pagans) are there Quitches? ๐Ÿ˜ˆ  No, I choose the label Quaker and I venerate my ancestors.  At this point in my life, I'm a non-theist. I don't worship gods of any kind. There is the Light, it's nature I do not know, who I recognize in Jesus, but do not believe comes from him (I've never really believed in the Trinity, anyway). But that's another blog for another time. The Religious Society of Friends is where I lay may head, where I have formal membership in FUM and FGC since 1988. I go to meetings every Sunday. I went to Guilford and Earlham School of Religion, two Quaker colleges.  I've tried to leave but keep coming back. 

I think this very blog post just shows why Quakers eschew outward symbols.  They carry meaning, if anything, and that meaning differs from person to person, from group to group.  They can serve as barriers, defining who's in and out, who's safe or not.  They have no power in themselves as Quakers  in the first century called the crosses of their contemporaries "dead crosses."  They should be handled with care, if they should be handled at all.  My first word as a child was "light" and how drawn I am to the symbols of light.

*update 9/2/22   I haven't felt the desire or need to wear jewelry of any kind, except what's pierced and can't be removed๐Ÿ‘ƒ. Uh oh. Here come the bonnets and dresses.

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